1 00:00:06,215 --> 00:00:09,468 A film based on a novel by B. Hrabal 2 00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:15,766 CUTTING IT SHORT 3 00:00:15,974 --> 00:00:18,519 Starring and Featuring 4 00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:38,914 Film Editor 5 00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:40,707 Sound Editor 6 00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:42,834 Set Designer 7 00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:44,545 Chief of Production Team 8 00:00:44,628 --> 00:00:48,215 Director of Photography 9 00:00:48,298 --> 00:00:51,885 Directed by 10 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:03,188 Feeling weak and pale. 11 00:01:04,189 --> 00:01:09,319 Down a pint of ale! 12 00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:30,132 I have something for you. 13 00:01:30,549 --> 00:01:32,926 Look for it! 14 00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:40,934 Cold. 15 00:01:43,687 --> 00:01:45,314 Cold. 16 00:01:47,899 --> 00:01:49,818 Cold. 17 00:01:52,571 --> 00:01:53,822 Cold. 18 00:01:58,744 --> 00:02:00,829 Warmer! 19 00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:03,123 Hot! 20 00:02:22,726 --> 00:02:25,270 Patent needle threader! 21 00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:34,696 Patent needle threader, is worth of brightest pearls. 22 00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:43,455 Your trembling hand shall not miss event he smallest eye! 23 00:02:50,962 --> 00:02:52,798 My good piggie... 24 00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:55,967 Don't be scared, Ludovic, 25 00:02:56,760 --> 00:03:00,889 you'll become very tasty ham! 26 00:03:38,093 --> 00:03:40,387 Here is the liver, 27 00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:44,266 now the heart. 28 00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:47,018 Beautiful, right? 29 00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:14,212 There's always enough malt, we even sell it locally. 30 00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:17,507 The barley is mealy, the grain is good, 31 00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:20,552 and five or seven crowns cheaper than last year. 32 00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:24,431 - Don't spend too much. - Order is the main thing. 33 00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:26,099 And decency. 34 00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:29,811 Here we leave the malt to mellow for 4 to 6 weeks. 35 00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:33,940 Then you clean it and grind it. This way please. 36 00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:03,845 - Well, Doctor, what do you think? - I can smell pork! 37 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:08,058 We stocked up well on ice during the winter season. 38 00:05:08,767 --> 00:05:10,143 How is that? 39 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:13,021 It is May, too warm to kill a pig! 40 00:05:13,355 --> 00:05:16,441 The pig broke its leg yesterday, unfortunately. 41 00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:21,321 As the manager you must do your best. 42 00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:23,532 And as the board of directors, 43 00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:25,867 we could sack you. 44 00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,877 - Pepper, salt... - Marjoram... 45 00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:38,588 - Thyme, garlic... - Ginger... 46 00:05:38,630 --> 00:05:40,590 No, this is not a cake. 47 00:05:41,049 --> 00:05:48,223 We've replaced the boiling sieves and other parts. 48 00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:51,476 We've changed direct heating to steam heating. 49 00:05:51,518 --> 00:05:54,688 So, if our beer's so good, why not produce more? 50 00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:57,649 Alright, we could start boiling also overnight. 51 00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:02,737 We introduced modern boiling and changed hops dosage distribution. 52 00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:06,074 Do you smoke the meat to conserve it? 53 00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:09,828 What my wife doesn't eat goes into the fridge. 54 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:15,709 During the winter season, we put resin in the barrels. 55 00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:19,212 And we boiled a lot in advance, so the beer is mellow, 56 00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:21,214 particularly the lagers. 57 00:06:21,256 --> 00:06:27,053 Good quality interests many inns, but we can't deliver to everyone. 58 00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:30,974 But I shall deliver it to pubs with large cold cellars, 59 00:06:31,016 --> 00:06:32,934 where it'll be well preserved. 60 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:39,232 So that our beer wins a good reputation. 61 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:42,736 Mind you, our beer has always had a good reputation! 62 00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:46,406 Before the new brewer came all it was good for was against constipation. 63 00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:49,534 We need to buy two more fermentation tubs 64 00:06:49,576 --> 00:06:53,663 to increase production by 5,000 hectol. per year. 65 00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:56,958 - So the percentage... - That's enough, Manager, 66 00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,337 we'll finish the topic in the board-room. 67 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:05,926 - I can smell fresh white pudding. - This way please. 68 00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:10,472 I also propose increasing the barrel manufacture. 69 00:07:11,514 --> 00:07:14,059 We could adjust... 70 00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:40,961 Where have you been again, Mr. Martin? 71 00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:43,588 I told you to bring wood! 72 00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:47,842 Stay here and stoke up! 73 00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:52,305 We'll make the sausages. 74 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,349 A bit more rum? 75 00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:56,685 Yes? 76 00:07:59,562 --> 00:08:01,564 So much work. 77 00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,079 Here! 78 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,393 Whatever the beer's like, I insist on order. 79 00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:22,395 - And decency! - And cleanliness. 80 00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:27,817 Leave the coal as it is, so people can see we can afford it. 81 00:09:28,193 --> 00:09:33,364 - You must try harder, Manager. - What a lovely smell, so lovely! 82 00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,713 So, help yourselves! Please. 83 00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:11,694 May I invite the gentlemen to a pork-feast? 84 00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:16,908 Well, we could finish our meeting tomorrow, right? 85 00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:54,946 Tastes delicious. 86 00:12:03,014 --> 00:12:05,433 An angel's flown by! 87 00:12:27,622 --> 00:12:31,793 - My God, I'm bloated! - The amount I've eaten today! 88 00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:38,758 - A full plate of soup. - It was a fairy-tale. 89 00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:42,428 White pudding, two sausages, 90 00:12:42,804 --> 00:12:44,472 more meat... 91 00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:47,850 and a cold sausage on top. 92 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:52,355 No, two cold sausages and then... 93 00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:56,484 Dear lady, 94 00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:01,698 I bow to your culinary expertise. 95 00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:06,911 What a beautiful, 96 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:10,373 relaxed afternoon. 97 00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:19,090 I have to look at 2 women in labour, 98 00:13:19,674 --> 00:13:23,177 and one with a gall-bladder attack. 99 00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:47,201 You must try harder, Manager. 100 00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:53,458 You must do your best, Manager. 101 00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,432 They're all dumb. 102 00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:42,882 I have something for you. 103 00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:52,642 What is it? 104 00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:55,061 CHEST EXPANDER 105 00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:11,577 Our chest expander will strengthen your muscles. 106 00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:16,207 The results will surprise you. 107 00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:20,336 You too will be as strong as a tiger. 108 00:15:20,545 --> 00:15:28,761 Which can kill a much bigger cow with one blow. 109 00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:54,328 Chest expander for men, women, for the whole family. 110 00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:04,005 I was falling asleep with the rosy image 111 00:16:04,630 --> 00:16:07,800 of having two steaks for breakfast. 112 00:16:09,051 --> 00:16:14,765 All Francin ever had was Luke-warm coffee and a slice of dry bread. 113 00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:30,656 Francin's muscles were as magnificent as the gladiator's 114 00:16:30,698 --> 00:16:32,950 on the chest expander box, 115 00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:37,747 but the poor man saw himself as a skinned rabbit. 116 00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:13,050 - What happened? - Pepin. 117 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,702 My brother-in-law and alive, at last! 118 00:18:40,661 --> 00:18:44,498 I was apprenticed as a small town shop-assistant, 119 00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:48,419 delivering soda water and living in the attic. 120 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:51,672 Dreamt of attending a business-school. 121 00:18:52,006 --> 00:18:55,384 I'd send my mom a florin, sometimes two. 122 00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,929 Pepin was a cobbler, worked from home 123 00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:02,224 but he would only shout and fight with shoes. 124 00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:07,146 Whilst others made two pairs, he barely made one pair. 125 00:19:08,814 --> 00:19:12,652 I used to send money home every month, 126 00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:16,822 so he wouldn't come here and shout the place down. 127 00:19:46,227 --> 00:19:48,979 Who are you, woman? Sister-in-law? 128 00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:51,691 - Yes, I am. Welcome, brother-in-law! - What's wrong? 129 00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:54,402 I've come to stay for two weeks and you're out flat! 130 00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:57,029 - Help yourself. - Yeah. 131 00:19:57,613 --> 00:20:00,950 Well, I've lost my appetite been feeling poorly. 132 00:20:01,742 --> 00:20:04,745 So, Francin, they all send their greetings 133 00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:07,707 except for Bochalena, she's had it for good, 134 00:20:07,748 --> 00:20:11,419 some trickster slipped gun powder or what into a log, 135 00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:16,090 the old hag stoked up the fire and it blew up and she was a goner. 136 00:20:16,132 --> 00:20:19,927 - How's your wife? - What are you talking about? I'm single. 137 00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:23,305 And priest broke his hip-bon so badly, 138 00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:25,474 that he will never fully recover. 139 00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:28,102 Uncle Zavicak was tiling the church spire 140 00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:30,855 the footbridge collapsed and down he fell, 141 00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:34,984 but straight into a linden-tree, on his back, 142 00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:37,528 but nothing happened to him 143 00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:41,240 and the priest ran down to bless him, 144 00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:44,410 stumbled over a step fell over and broke his leg. 145 00:20:44,452 --> 00:20:49,331 Old Zavicak took him to Prostejov hospital. 146 00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:53,711 Perfect, right? 147 00:20:54,670 --> 00:20:58,090 A company called Salamander makes the glue. 148 00:20:58,841 --> 00:21:02,261 And as you're an exceptionally clever woman, sister-in-law, 149 00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:05,931 I'll mend all your shoes for you in those 2 weeks. 150 00:21:05,973 --> 00:21:09,018 I'm a profession a list when it comes to shoes. 151 00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:12,104 This is the Parisian style, 152 00:21:12,146 --> 00:21:15,983 this here is the instep and it also has other names. 153 00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:20,154 This is the heel, or Absatz in German or Austrian. 154 00:21:20,654 --> 00:21:24,366 Well, if you want to practice cobbling, you've got to have a diploma. 155 00:21:24,408 --> 00:21:28,162 It's like being a doctor or having A-levels. 156 00:21:28,788 --> 00:21:32,875 I'll teach you all I know in the two weeks I'm staying. 157 00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:35,002 Two weeks? 158 00:21:35,336 --> 00:21:38,047 Two years probably, most likely a life sentence. 159 00:21:38,088 --> 00:21:39,590 Francin! 160 00:21:50,726 --> 00:21:53,646 I'll make apple strudel. 161 00:21:57,942 --> 00:22:01,695 Your sausages are damn good, pity I'm feeling so poorly. 162 00:22:01,737 --> 00:22:05,491 I'll teach you everything. I made shoes for a guy 163 00:22:05,533 --> 00:22:09,203 who was a court shoemaker, not only the Emperor, 164 00:22:09,286 --> 00:22:11,956 but the whole region liked him, where he supplied his shoes. 165 00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:13,916 - On a bicycle. - Rubbish. 166 00:22:13,958 --> 00:22:17,002 Such a supplier is not a common tradesman, 167 00:22:17,044 --> 00:22:20,798 if the Emperor saw him on a bike, he would take him... 168 00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:22,883 - That bike. - Rubbish. The title 169 00:22:22,925 --> 00:22:25,010 and the eagle from the shop sign! 170 00:22:25,052 --> 00:22:32,101 As you saw and as I've shown you, we are highly active. 171 00:22:33,686 --> 00:22:35,145 ...highly active. 172 00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:41,068 We have improved the quality of beer using first-class ingredients, 173 00:22:41,110 --> 00:22:45,155 by implementing modern technologies from abroad, too, 174 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:51,745 and I also use my Laurin and Klement motorcycle to ride round local inns 175 00:22:52,079 --> 00:22:55,749 and gather new contracts, which is... 176 00:22:56,542 --> 00:22:59,628 Old Kafka was so nervous, that when his little girl 177 00:22:59,670 --> 00:23:02,339 kept hitting her head on the furniture, 178 00:23:02,381 --> 00:23:05,593 he padded all the edges of the furniture. 179 00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:09,221 And to be more active still... 180 00:23:09,263 --> 00:23:12,600 He was so nervous that he opened the door with such force that in the end 181 00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:14,977 that he hit her himself and made her unconscious. 182 00:23:15,019 --> 00:23:19,648 So he padded, on a friend's advice, his little girl's forehead instead. 183 00:23:19,690 --> 00:23:23,777 And then uncle Method read an advert: 184 00:23:24,194 --> 00:23:26,822 Are you bored? Buy a raccoon! 185 00:23:26,864 --> 00:23:30,618 So he ordered one, as he had no kids himself. 186 00:23:30,659 --> 00:23:34,496 The raccoon was like a kid, it arrived a week later. 187 00:23:34,538 --> 00:23:38,584 It loved everyone, but kept washing everything. 188 00:23:38,626 --> 00:23:42,046 Once he washed uncle's clock and his three pocket-watches 189 00:23:42,087 --> 00:23:44,131 and now nobody can fix them. 190 00:23:44,173 --> 00:23:48,385 And the raccoon also took... The cakes are really good! 191 00:23:48,427 --> 00:23:54,308 ...bicycle parts to wash them in a stream. And the neighbors were saying... 192 00:23:54,350 --> 00:23:56,560 I wrote up these signs... 193 00:23:57,478 --> 00:24:02,691 And when uncle kissed auntie, the raccoon wanted to kiss too! 194 00:24:02,733 --> 00:24:07,112 So he had to go and kiss her in the woods like when they were young. 195 00:24:07,154 --> 00:24:11,659 I wrote the signs and the board should decide 196 00:24:12,660 --> 00:24:17,331 if we should have them printed. I'd take them round the inns 197 00:24:17,373 --> 00:24:23,420 on my business trips on my Laurin and Klement motorcycle. 198 00:24:24,129 --> 00:24:27,257 I'd like to mention one more slogan. 199 00:24:27,716 --> 00:24:32,763 Only our May lager will make the thirsty truly thirsty. 200 00:24:33,847 --> 00:24:39,019 - What do you think of that, gentlemen? - What's that inhuman shouting? 201 00:24:39,061 --> 00:24:42,106 My brother's on a visit, for two weeks. 202 00:24:42,773 --> 00:24:46,652 Please go and tell him to stop it at once. 203 00:24:46,694 --> 00:24:48,529 This is our brewery! 204 00:24:48,570 --> 00:24:51,448 Tell him to do his hollering out in the fields! 205 00:24:51,490 --> 00:24:53,784 ...the raccoon moved from the Dutch stove in the room 206 00:24:53,826 --> 00:24:56,495 and mucked up all the furniture and beddings. 207 00:24:56,537 --> 00:24:58,622 So uncle Method wrote an advert: 208 00:24:58,664 --> 00:25:01,291 Are you bored? Buy a raccoon. 209 00:25:02,626 --> 00:25:05,462 And he was heavy-hearted no longer. 210 00:25:05,504 --> 00:25:09,299 Why are you two shouting, you peasants? 211 00:25:11,343 --> 00:25:14,179 It's not me, it's somebody inside me. 212 00:25:14,221 --> 00:25:18,767 For mercy's sake, stop it. You endanger my position. 213 00:25:23,022 --> 00:25:28,235 You want me to go back to accounting? Instead of in the brewery? 214 00:25:32,448 --> 00:25:36,326 You should be with the police, Pepin, you're so clever! 215 00:25:36,368 --> 00:25:39,329 - Don't be silly, sister-in-law. - Silence. 216 00:25:40,581 --> 00:25:45,377 Uncle Adolf was a copper, one day he was chasing a scoundrel. 217 00:25:45,919 --> 00:25:49,423 They surrounded the building and when they entered the kitchen, 218 00:25:49,465 --> 00:25:52,843 there was an old hag sitting there and the chief detective said to her: 219 00:25:52,885 --> 00:25:54,428 Where's your old man? 220 00:25:54,470 --> 00:25:58,515 The guy jumped out of the window, she said, into a cesspool. 221 00:26:02,519 --> 00:26:05,481 - Please continue. -Yes. 222 00:26:06,607 --> 00:26:10,152 The hop-growers are competitive. 223 00:26:10,903 --> 00:26:16,658 The board should allow me to ride on my Laurin and Klement 224 00:26:17,409 --> 00:26:22,748 and interview them personally in the Zatec area. And... 225 00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:28,253 Excuse me... 226 00:26:29,797 --> 00:26:37,930 He threw away the gun and chased him to the bus stop with the cuffs. 227 00:26:39,014 --> 00:26:42,392 They wouldn't let Adolf go in the police car, 228 00:26:42,434 --> 00:26:47,439 but he stank too much, so he had to walk towards Ostrava. 229 00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:50,275 Then they kicked him out of the tram. 230 00:26:50,317 --> 00:26:54,363 He walked home all the way and his landlady refused to wash his suit, 231 00:26:54,404 --> 00:26:56,740 so he took the suit to the cleaner's... 232 00:26:56,782 --> 00:26:59,785 We shall resume the meeting in half an hour. 233 00:26:59,827 --> 00:27:04,206 Ask the accountant for a basin of lukewarm water. 234 00:27:04,248 --> 00:27:08,210 Careful, Mr. Manager. It might have an negative impact. 235 00:27:08,252 --> 00:27:10,712 An important meeting is turning into a comedy, 236 00:27:10,754 --> 00:27:13,966 into a Charlie Chaplin or Lupino Lane act. 237 00:27:14,007 --> 00:27:16,301 And she screamed at Adolf: You've shat your trousers 238 00:27:16,343 --> 00:27:19,388 so wash them yourself! What a shame it was. 239 00:27:20,514 --> 00:27:23,934 What is this muck? I say what is this muck? 240 00:27:23,976 --> 00:27:26,520 The best glue in the world, 241 00:27:26,562 --> 00:27:30,440 made in Vienna by the Salamander shoemaker company. 242 00:28:32,711 --> 00:28:35,255 Thanks a lot, brother. 243 00:28:42,429 --> 00:28:45,349 Uncle Adolf, he was truly unlucky. 244 00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:48,185 One day he met drunk 245 00:28:48,227 --> 00:28:52,773 dentists in a pub. They invited them to their table. 246 00:28:52,814 --> 00:28:59,321 And later they pulled out each other's front teeth. 247 00:28:59,863 --> 00:29:03,575 Uncle Adolf's too, because he was as pissed as a newt, too. 248 00:29:03,617 --> 00:29:05,160 How unlucky! 249 00:29:05,202 --> 00:29:09,915 Not really, what if they had been the vets that castrate animals! 250 00:29:09,957 --> 00:29:12,626 So he was lucky then. 251 00:30:39,755 --> 00:30:43,342 An insurance clerk called Korec, 252 00:30:43,759 --> 00:30:46,386 had his son studying in Olomouc. 253 00:30:46,428 --> 00:30:50,599 Dr. Karafiat came to him as an inspector and complained 254 00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:53,977 that people weren't getting their sick-pay. 255 00:30:54,311 --> 00:30:57,189 The insurance guy admitted pocketing it 256 00:30:57,230 --> 00:31:00,067 and sending the money to his son to pay his studies. 257 00:31:00,108 --> 00:31:03,320 The doctor said it wasn't his business. So this Korec took a scythe, 258 00:31:03,362 --> 00:31:06,782 drank a bottle of rum and cut his throat. 259 00:31:07,491 --> 00:31:09,159 These days life is easier. 260 00:31:09,201 --> 00:31:12,954 Husbands and wives take turns hanging themselves. 261 00:31:12,996 --> 00:31:15,707 Like that cobbler who thieved at night, 262 00:31:15,749 --> 00:31:18,293 his wife couldn't steal at all, 263 00:31:18,335 --> 00:31:22,464 so he hanged himself, couldn't bear the shame. 264 00:31:22,506 --> 00:31:28,261 Like this Chytil, whose wife sold shirts, but was a thief as well. 265 00:31:29,012 --> 00:31:33,517 And when the coppers found out, he was so ashamed he hanged himself, too. 266 00:34:05,043 --> 00:34:10,048 Gone is all our love 267 00:34:12,050 --> 00:34:16,555 Enough to make you weep 268 00:34:19,558 --> 00:34:24,396 Nothing left at all 269 00:34:26,314 --> 00:34:29,359 All drowned in the deep... 270 00:34:29,859 --> 00:34:33,780 Depends if it's real passion or just fun, you see. 271 00:34:33,822 --> 00:34:36,616 One woman had 22 children 272 00:34:36,866 --> 00:34:41,204 and the other nothing, even if a brewery chimney fell on her. 273 00:34:51,214 --> 00:34:56,136 Nothing left at all 274 00:35:59,074 --> 00:36:06,414 Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So, La, Si... 275 00:36:07,540 --> 00:36:09,125 Do! 276 00:36:10,043 --> 00:36:12,629 Do, Si, La... 277 00:36:17,717 --> 00:36:20,261 - I'm going to sing! - What will you have for breakfast, 278 00:36:20,303 --> 00:36:23,640 - tea, coffee, milk, chocolate or beer? - Rum! 279 00:36:58,967 --> 00:37:03,471 Remember, dear friend, every woman is potentially evil. 280 00:37:06,433 --> 00:37:08,351 Good morning. 281 00:37:11,855 --> 00:37:14,482 What was I talking about? 282 00:37:14,899 --> 00:37:19,696 - Women. - Ah, yes. Woman is the only good 283 00:37:19,988 --> 00:37:22,699 we still have in the world. 284 00:37:40,216 --> 00:37:43,303 FASHIONABLE COIFFURES 285 00:37:45,764 --> 00:37:48,308 Come back tomorrow. 286 00:37:51,936 --> 00:37:54,439 This won't do, Mr. Tapster. 287 00:37:54,481 --> 00:37:58,359 The beer is tepid, the pipes unwashed, 288 00:37:58,401 --> 00:38:00,904 not to mention the glasses. 289 00:38:00,945 --> 00:38:04,491 You're ruining the reputation of our beer. 290 00:38:05,283 --> 00:38:08,828 We shall have to cancel the contract. 291 00:38:59,629 --> 00:39:02,882 Look at this beauty in the jug, Mr. Brewer. 292 00:39:02,924 --> 00:39:04,843 See this froth of the beer. 293 00:39:04,884 --> 00:39:07,136 It isn't froth, but whipped cream! 294 00:39:07,178 --> 00:39:10,223 It isn�t cream, but whipped custard! 295 00:39:10,265 --> 00:39:14,644 - It isn't custard, it's... - It's not cold enough. 296 00:39:19,649 --> 00:39:22,777 Azure, the colour of summer. 297 00:39:25,238 --> 00:39:29,117 So we'll choose this colour of hope. 298 00:39:30,159 --> 00:39:31,578 Azure. 299 00:39:33,371 --> 00:39:36,040 The chamomile smells so nice. 300 00:40:12,994 --> 00:40:15,663 This fountain and that brewer wife's hair 301 00:40:15,705 --> 00:40:18,333 are the pride of our town. 302 00:40:18,541 --> 00:40:20,293 How dare you? 303 00:40:20,335 --> 00:40:22,712 The beer's not cool enough, I'm telling you. 304 00:40:22,754 --> 00:40:24,797 This is our hotel, it's our business. 305 00:40:24,839 --> 00:40:28,927 - We are the Board of Directors. - We'll send you enough ice. 306 00:40:36,559 --> 00:40:40,480 - Good morning, gentlemen! - Good morning, good morning. 307 00:40:40,521 --> 00:40:44,192 - Hello, Francin. - Hello. - When will you get home? 308 00:40:44,233 --> 00:40:46,486 I don't know, I have to arrange something. 309 00:40:46,527 --> 00:40:50,448 Permit me to drink to the beauty of your hair! 310 00:40:50,490 --> 00:40:53,952 - To your culinary art! - Yes, absolutely. 311 00:41:13,513 --> 00:41:17,308 Dear Lady Brewer, have one with us, please. 312 00:41:19,435 --> 00:41:22,814 - Your health! - To yours! - Come on! 313 00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:50,091 Good, but not cold enough. 314 00:41:51,259 --> 00:41:53,177 Goodbye. 315 00:42:15,408 --> 00:42:19,620 We'll make you a lovable creature 316 00:42:20,246 --> 00:42:24,125 With a golden collar round your neck... 317 00:42:27,879 --> 00:42:29,756 ...little wind... 318 00:42:36,846 --> 00:42:40,433 You'll look like a flower 319 00:42:41,225 --> 00:42:46,105 The world will rejoice 320 00:42:46,856 --> 00:42:51,152 It'll be wild to see you dance... 321 00:42:57,408 --> 00:43:00,078 Do, Re, Mi, Fa... 322 00:43:04,832 --> 00:43:06,959 Do, Si, La... 323 00:43:12,256 --> 00:43:15,468 Do, Re, Mi, Fa... 324 00:43:20,890 --> 00:43:23,267 Do, Si, La... 325 00:43:45,414 --> 00:43:47,083 Just perfect! 326 00:43:47,125 --> 00:43:54,132 My heart is a beehive abuzz with pretty girls... 327 00:45:46,118 --> 00:45:49,330 - What can I do for you? - Nothing. 328 00:45:49,372 --> 00:45:52,124 Wait till I run out of petrol. 329 00:46:51,559 --> 00:46:57,148 And then Johnny began to sing his song 330 00:46:57,690 --> 00:47:06,907 And kissing his Bonnie girl 331 00:47:42,068 --> 00:47:44,320 I've brought you something. 332 00:47:51,243 --> 00:47:52,953 Look for it! 333 00:48:01,796 --> 00:48:03,714 Cold... 334 00:48:08,594 --> 00:48:10,262 Cold... 335 00:48:20,064 --> 00:48:21,524 What is it? 336 00:48:30,199 --> 00:48:33,661 Oh, God, so beautiful... 337 00:48:38,499 --> 00:48:40,501 What is it for? 338 00:48:42,294 --> 00:48:43,671 Put the light out. 339 00:48:49,427 --> 00:48:52,263 Now Pepin can scream all day, 340 00:48:53,305 --> 00:48:56,183 I can have problems at work, 341 00:48:56,559 --> 00:48:59,437 they can all offend me as they will, 342 00:49:00,146 --> 00:49:04,066 but these sparks give me zest for life. 343 00:49:04,692 --> 00:49:06,735 Life courage. 344 00:49:14,452 --> 00:49:16,954 This purple ozone, Maryska, 345 00:49:16,996 --> 00:49:21,000 will take away your longing to do in public all the things 346 00:49:21,041 --> 00:49:24,003 polite people hardly dare even think about. 347 00:49:24,128 --> 00:49:26,172 Or to do them at home. 348 00:49:26,213 --> 00:49:30,176 - Well, here I am! - Shut the door! - Yeah. 349 00:49:34,305 --> 00:49:38,100 This is good for your health, for your nerves. 350 00:49:39,393 --> 00:49:42,646 We shall do it every day, Maryska, yes? 351 00:49:44,315 --> 00:49:46,275 Yes, Francin. 352 00:49:49,361 --> 00:49:52,239 We shall do it every night. 353 00:49:55,993 --> 00:49:59,914 Gorgeous! Like a parody on genital hygiene! 354 00:50:00,998 --> 00:50:03,459 Uncle Pepin, I bet you are hungry. 355 00:50:08,839 --> 00:50:12,384 My boss had a daughter, Mary. A belly like a chamber-pot, 356 00:50:12,426 --> 00:50:16,263 bust like Maria Theresa, bottom like a cistern. 357 00:50:16,305 --> 00:50:21,268 One night they said to me: You're sleeping here, by the stove. 358 00:50:51,966 --> 00:50:56,011 Come morning Mary touched me and put those tits on my chest 359 00:50:56,387 --> 00:51:02,434 and I jumped up and split my head open on the stove. 360 00:51:05,938 --> 00:51:08,857 And as I started cleaning the wound, 361 00:51:08,899 --> 00:51:13,529 the whole family jumped off their beds happy there'd be a wedding. 362 00:51:13,737 --> 00:51:16,949 - Francin! - And then Mary bought me a tie 363 00:51:16,991 --> 00:51:22,538 and a ring. I wouldn't have it, pretending to be weak in the chest. 364 00:51:22,580 --> 00:51:25,624 She married a guy called Jetrutka. 365 00:51:32,089 --> 00:51:34,925 A drunkard he was, 366 00:51:35,801 --> 00:51:39,471 every time he sneezed he got Mary pregnant. 367 00:52:28,228 --> 00:52:32,608 1,2,1,2,1,2... 368 00:52:33,984 --> 00:52:35,778 Stop! 369 00:52:35,903 --> 00:52:37,655 Right foot forwards, 370 00:52:37,696 --> 00:52:41,158 shoulders back, chest up, Attention... 371 00:52:43,410 --> 00:52:46,622 1, 2,1, 2... 372 00:52:55,005 --> 00:52:58,300 This here is called the jabber. 373 00:52:58,634 --> 00:53:01,804 And this is the barrel... 374 00:53:01,970 --> 00:53:04,807 Beer barrel. Whiskey barrel. 375 00:53:05,391 --> 00:53:08,686 You're soft in the head, sister-in-law. 376 00:53:09,269 --> 00:53:13,774 If you said that to the Captain he'd cut you up with his saber. 377 00:53:13,982 --> 00:53:18,612 Barrel of the gun, that's what it is. 378 00:53:19,196 --> 00:53:21,115 Attention! 379 00:53:21,365 --> 00:53:27,287 1,2,3,4... 380 00:53:39,299 --> 00:53:42,720 For offending the greatest army - 381 00:53:43,053 --> 00:53:44,763 the Austrian! 382 00:53:46,765 --> 00:53:48,392 1, 2... 383 00:53:48,434 --> 00:53:52,187 - Why are you yelling here? - We're playing at soldiers. 384 00:53:52,229 --> 00:53:56,817 - Meaning drill. - Play at what you like, but not here. 385 00:53:56,859 --> 00:54:01,113 - Where are we to play? - On top of the chimney for all I care. 386 00:54:01,989 --> 00:54:04,283 But quietly! 387 00:54:05,784 --> 00:54:08,162 The chimney? 388 00:54:09,413 --> 00:54:11,498 The chimney. 389 00:54:31,769 --> 00:54:35,314 Francin has frayed nerves. Baptists would say to him 390 00:54:35,355 --> 00:54:39,359 that he should wash his private parts with lukewarm water. 391 00:54:43,947 --> 00:54:45,657 After you. 392 00:54:50,788 --> 00:54:53,665 The chimney, he said. So the chimney it is. 393 00:55:37,292 --> 00:55:40,128 Oh yes, sister-in-law. 394 00:55:41,964 --> 00:55:44,967 This would make a great command-post! 395 00:55:45,175 --> 00:55:47,261 Or a lookout tower. 396 00:55:47,386 --> 00:55:50,889 Rubbish! That's for civilians, 397 00:55:51,348 --> 00:55:56,186 a command post's for soldier monitoring enemy movements. 398 00:56:00,691 --> 00:56:03,735 An intelligent beauty you are, sister-in-law, 399 00:56:03,777 --> 00:56:08,532 but if the Captain heard you he'd hit you with his saber and shout: 400 00:56:08,866 --> 00:56:11,785 I'll hack your Willie off! 401 00:56:18,959 --> 00:56:25,257 But he wouldn't hack my Willie off, he liked me, I carried his saber. 402 00:56:27,843 --> 00:56:29,803 I was a perfect student, 403 00:56:30,387 --> 00:56:33,765 all merit and distinction. 404 00:56:37,603 --> 00:56:44,943 But how could the Colonel remember one thousand men? 405 00:56:45,402 --> 00:56:48,238 - Isn't it beautiful, Uncle Pepin? - It is. 406 00:57:44,336 --> 00:57:45,837 Pepin, 407 00:57:47,506 --> 00:57:50,717 is it true that in the army you grazed goats? 408 00:57:51,134 --> 00:57:52,803 Who said that? 409 00:57:52,970 --> 00:57:56,473 The tobacconist. He was a Captain in the war 410 00:57:56,515 --> 00:57:59,851 and watched you through his binoculars. 411 00:58:04,356 --> 00:58:07,401 Tobacconists couldn't be Captains, 412 00:58:07,442 --> 00:58:10,278 the Emperor wouldn't have it. 413 00:58:13,281 --> 00:58:17,411 The Emperor would never give binoculars to a tobacconist. 414 00:58:17,452 --> 00:58:20,914 A wounded soldier could later become a tobacconist, 415 00:58:21,581 --> 00:58:24,543 but a tobacconist couldn't become a Captain. 416 00:59:03,790 --> 00:59:05,667 Forward, now! 417 00:59:38,075 --> 00:59:40,869 - Are you dizzy, sir? - Dizzy? 418 00:59:42,788 --> 00:59:44,372 Horribly dizzy! 419 00:59:46,208 --> 00:59:49,503 In the name of the law, climb down. 420 00:59:50,420 --> 00:59:52,255 Your brother-in-law, too. 421 00:59:54,716 --> 00:59:56,510 After you. 422 01:00:02,099 --> 01:00:05,560 I'll go down on the inside, to practice it. 423 01:00:07,145 --> 01:00:10,565 Pepin! Down! 424 01:00:19,699 --> 01:00:23,411 Are you bored? Buy a raccoon. 425 01:01:14,337 --> 01:01:16,673 You deserve spanking. 426 01:01:17,048 --> 01:01:20,093 - On my bare bottom. - On your bare bottom. 427 01:01:21,928 --> 01:01:25,098 It must have been wonderful up there. 428 01:01:26,099 --> 01:01:28,810 Yes, as it was dangerous, 429 01:01:29,519 --> 01:01:32,105 and what's dangerous is the right thing. 430 01:01:32,147 --> 01:01:36,026 The Austrian soldier triumphs again! 431 01:01:36,943 --> 01:01:38,862 Perfect. 432 01:01:39,404 --> 01:01:42,365 Is that your brother, the shouter? 433 01:01:42,782 --> 01:01:45,285 - Yes, that's him. - That's me. 434 01:01:46,620 --> 01:01:48,330 What's his trade? 435 01:01:48,663 --> 01:01:51,374 A cobbler and a maltster! 436 01:01:52,292 --> 01:01:57,422 Give him a job in the brewery, that's an order. 437 01:01:57,797 --> 01:02:02,219 For shouting, work is the best cure of all. 438 01:02:14,814 --> 01:02:17,108 The operation is over. 439 01:02:17,901 --> 01:02:19,569 Drive off! 440 01:02:22,322 --> 01:02:26,743 We are a voluntary fire brigade, Mr. Manager, 441 01:02:27,285 --> 01:02:30,038 not firemen from an American film 442 01:02:30,080 --> 01:02:32,165 with Lupino Lane. 443 01:02:32,374 --> 01:02:35,168 We shall send you the bill! 444 01:02:41,633 --> 01:02:44,636 It must have been beautiful up there! 445 01:03:04,990 --> 01:03:08,410 Francin's nerves are damned frayed... 446 01:03:38,815 --> 01:03:40,275 Francin! 447 01:03:48,366 --> 01:03:51,369 The music will give you strength, 448 01:03:54,998 --> 01:03:56,875 heal your nerves, 449 01:04:01,171 --> 01:04:03,590 revive your organism. 450 01:05:02,649 --> 01:05:05,693 When I did this with Miss Vlasta at the bar, 451 01:05:05,735 --> 01:05:09,072 the dragoons screamed and wanted more brandy! 452 01:05:28,341 --> 01:05:29,676 Ouch! 453 01:05:39,853 --> 01:05:41,438 My foot! 454 01:05:53,408 --> 01:05:55,952 - We must call the Doctor. - Yeah. 455 01:05:58,163 --> 01:05:59,873 What a disaster. 456 01:05:59,914 --> 01:06:04,919 What have you been up to now? 457 01:06:07,839 --> 01:06:12,802 If she doesn't stay in bed she'll be on crutches for life, 458 01:06:15,013 --> 01:06:16,931 or be in a wheelchair. 459 01:06:17,932 --> 01:06:22,103 Like I said, complete rest 460 01:06:22,854 --> 01:06:25,023 and we will see in two weeks. 461 01:06:28,818 --> 01:06:31,279 Brother, can you forgive me? 462 01:06:32,363 --> 01:06:35,200 You were sent to me by heaven. 463 01:06:45,877 --> 01:06:48,671 What else does in the fodder? 464 01:06:49,255 --> 01:06:53,259 Crush the potatoes, they're in the pot. 465 01:06:54,177 --> 01:06:57,388 - You can cut apples, too. - Good. 466 01:06:58,848 --> 01:07:03,102 And you must take your temperature, you coughed last night. 467 01:07:12,904 --> 01:07:14,239 Ouch! 468 01:07:14,989 --> 01:07:17,116 38.6. 469 01:07:18,952 --> 01:07:21,204 Well, that's a fever. 470 01:07:22,205 --> 01:07:24,582 A cold compress, 471 01:07:27,210 --> 01:07:30,046 so your lungs 472 01:07:31,339 --> 01:07:35,593 don't get stuck to your pleura. 473 01:07:36,928 --> 01:07:39,180 That could mean pneumonia. 474 01:07:48,940 --> 01:07:52,777 Now he has me like he wanted. He can now hope 475 01:07:52,819 --> 01:07:56,906 to have me in a wheelchair, if my ankle doesn't heal well. 476 01:07:56,948 --> 01:08:00,702 He'd be the happiest of husbands. 477 01:08:02,328 --> 01:08:05,582 Now he has me where he always wanted me, 478 01:08:05,623 --> 01:08:08,293 ill and helpless. 479 01:08:10,712 --> 01:08:12,130 Francin? 480 01:08:13,840 --> 01:08:16,134 Do you have a minute? 481 01:08:16,384 --> 01:08:19,804 Of course, you're an invalid now. 482 01:08:20,805 --> 01:08:26,102 So go down to the cellar, there's a pot with a heavy stone. 483 01:08:27,478 --> 01:08:31,983 And under the stone, there's meat, ready to be smoked. 484 01:08:32,025 --> 01:08:34,986 Go there and turn it over. 485 01:08:35,862 --> 01:08:37,196 Me? 486 01:08:37,864 --> 01:08:40,241 You know I have a horror of meat. 487 01:08:41,451 --> 01:08:46,414 You'll have me in a wheelchair, I think, 488 01:08:47,582 --> 01:08:50,418 remember I'm an invalid. 489 01:08:53,921 --> 01:08:56,633 I'll go at once, my dear. 490 01:08:58,092 --> 01:09:00,345 I know, you're an invalid. 491 01:09:09,228 --> 01:09:11,230 Ugh, garlic. 492 01:09:41,344 --> 01:09:44,472 Go with it quickly until it's fresh. 493 01:09:46,265 --> 01:09:47,975 You can go. 494 01:10:58,421 --> 01:11:01,924 - I have something for you. - What? 495 01:11:02,216 --> 01:11:04,594 - Close your eyes! - Yes. 496 01:11:05,052 --> 01:11:07,889 - Are they shut? - Yes. 497 01:11:08,055 --> 01:11:10,725 - You won't peep? - No. 498 01:11:12,977 --> 01:11:14,520 So... 499 01:11:16,689 --> 01:11:18,775 - Now? - Now. 500 01:11:21,360 --> 01:11:23,946 Oh, it's beautiful! 501 01:11:25,740 --> 01:11:28,326 - Do you like it? - Yes. 502 01:11:31,204 --> 01:11:34,582 - And who bought it for you? - Francin. 503 01:11:34,624 --> 01:11:37,293 - And who is that? - You. 504 01:11:37,585 --> 01:11:39,712 And who am? 505 01:11:44,675 --> 01:11:46,803 l am your...? 506 01:11:47,553 --> 01:11:49,514 My hubbie. 507 01:12:05,905 --> 01:12:08,366 What more could I wish for? 508 01:12:08,407 --> 01:12:11,452 I feel fine, my wife's an invalid 509 01:12:11,702 --> 01:12:15,414 and brother Pepin's working and stopped shouting. 510 01:14:44,855 --> 01:14:48,234 Who says I'm losing my voice. 511 01:14:50,194 --> 01:14:52,697 Alright, we will do it. 512 01:14:56,909 --> 01:14:59,996 - Hello, brother. - Are the canals clean? - Not yet. 513 01:15:00,037 --> 01:15:02,206 So Pepin will go and clean them, 514 01:15:02,248 --> 01:15:05,209 there he can bellow as he likes, 515 01:15:05,251 --> 01:15:07,044 but not in German, 516 01:15:07,086 --> 01:15:10,131 all our board-members are Sokol patriots. 517 01:15:17,263 --> 01:15:20,641 Why not be happy 518 01:15:20,975 --> 01:15:24,311 Why not be happy 519 01:15:25,062 --> 01:15:28,232 If God gives us health 520 01:15:28,774 --> 01:15:32,111 If God gives us health 521 01:15:32,153 --> 01:15:35,698 If God gives us health 522 01:15:36,115 --> 01:15:39,618 And who would think that... 523 01:16:00,264 --> 01:16:05,436 And told Pauline to stand up and give little Martin a hug. 524 01:16:05,478 --> 01:16:09,106 And then they kissed, as they were told. 525 01:16:10,483 --> 01:16:13,861 Miss Pauline stood and gave Zemla her hand. 526 01:16:13,903 --> 01:16:18,199 He was so happy. 527 01:16:21,786 --> 01:16:24,163 But they would hardly have kissed 528 01:16:24,205 --> 01:16:28,209 had the good lady Sustrova not given them a push. 529 01:16:28,751 --> 01:16:33,589 Martin felt electricity running through him 530 01:16:34,173 --> 01:16:38,427 when he kissed her lovely pink lips, 531 01:16:39,595 --> 01:16:43,599 and felt the girl's breasts against his chest. 532 01:16:46,852 --> 01:16:49,355 - Well, here I am. - Welcome. 533 01:16:53,192 --> 01:16:54,568 What a disaster. 534 01:16:54,985 --> 01:16:57,404 Old Bochalena had a vision 535 01:16:57,446 --> 01:17:03,661 that a big horse with burning mane flew over our town. 536 01:17:04,411 --> 01:17:07,540 She said: this means war. 537 01:17:10,543 --> 01:17:12,628 And war it was. 538 01:17:14,338 --> 01:17:18,300 And last year the whole town was astonished, 539 01:17:19,426 --> 01:17:22,847 when baby Jesus flew above the town square. 540 01:17:22,888 --> 01:17:24,974 But then it was explained. 541 01:17:25,141 --> 01:17:28,477 You see, little Lolan grazed his sheep 542 01:17:29,311 --> 01:17:32,815 and an airplane flew past, 543 01:17:33,315 --> 01:17:38,737 dragging a rope with bag to test it, the rope got round Lolan's foot 544 01:17:38,904 --> 01:17:43,242 and Lolan, a pretty child that he was, platinum hair and all, 545 01:17:43,284 --> 01:17:46,453 was up there in the sky. 546 01:17:46,704 --> 01:17:53,085 So Lolan was in the air, but the old women thought it was baby Jesus. 547 01:17:53,335 --> 01:17:56,422 And then he got caught in that old linden tree by the church, 548 01:17:56,463 --> 01:18:02,720 and as this Jesus or Lolan fell, he asked: 549 01:18:03,596 --> 01:18:05,723 Where is my flock? 550 01:18:05,764 --> 01:18:08,601 The women begged him to bless them. 551 01:18:08,851 --> 01:18:10,644 So he started... 552 01:18:24,575 --> 01:18:28,996 Said goodbye and mother went into the kitchen 553 01:18:29,288 --> 01:18:35,211 for some water... but in fact to allow the young people... 554 01:18:41,050 --> 01:18:43,552 ...a tender farewell. 555 01:19:06,075 --> 01:19:07,618 Alright, 556 01:19:08,827 --> 01:19:13,123 the compresses were good. 557 01:19:17,086 --> 01:19:20,798 Excuse me, a bit of cold. 558 01:19:22,049 --> 01:19:26,637 It's these night-time call-ins. I shall listen to your lungs. 559 01:19:26,679 --> 01:19:28,889 Pull up your shirt. 560 01:19:35,229 --> 01:19:37,606 Breathe deeply. 561 01:19:48,117 --> 01:19:52,037 Those who drink, die. Those who don't, die too. 562 01:19:52,162 --> 01:19:55,374 But who drinks our May lager won't want to die! 563 01:20:00,129 --> 01:20:01,755 Mar ya? 564 01:20:41,712 --> 01:20:44,673 A common cold, that's all. 565 01:20:45,883 --> 01:20:47,426 I'll write... 566 01:20:49,345 --> 01:20:50,929 a prescription. 567 01:20:54,350 --> 01:20:56,602 Mornings are still cold. 568 01:20:56,685 --> 01:21:01,774 Three pills a day. 569 01:21:03,025 --> 01:21:05,652 Morning, afternoon and... 570 01:21:08,530 --> 01:21:10,824 ...and evening. God bless. 571 01:21:11,075 --> 01:21:16,205 My husband bought me a therapeutic fulguration apparatus. 572 01:21:17,623 --> 01:21:20,292 There's a cathode pipe for colds, 573 01:21:20,334 --> 01:21:24,546 eucalyptus oil, fragrant pine-wood... 574 01:21:25,506 --> 01:21:28,384 A fulguration apparatus, you say? 575 01:21:28,842 --> 01:21:33,972 I'd sure like to see this box of tricks! 576 01:21:37,017 --> 01:21:39,812 - You understand it? - Of course. 577 01:21:40,354 --> 01:21:44,358 This is the eucalyptus oil, it smells of resin. 578 01:21:46,068 --> 01:21:50,030 I shall place the ozone inhaler in your nose, 579 01:21:51,240 --> 01:21:53,325 but you must lie down. 580 01:21:56,203 --> 01:22:01,125 - Do you feel the neon rays? - How poetic. 581 01:22:01,542 --> 01:22:05,421 That's the ozone - the scent of summer storms. 582 01:22:08,048 --> 01:22:12,136 Blue is your colour, mine too. 583 01:22:13,429 --> 01:22:17,850 Calms down the nerves, slows down blood circulation. 584 01:22:20,894 --> 01:22:23,689 Yes, blue colour. 585 01:22:25,357 --> 01:22:28,360 And fragrant pinewood. 586 01:22:30,487 --> 01:22:32,531 What are you doing? 587 01:22:33,449 --> 01:22:35,742 Oh, God, what is it? 588 01:23:19,369 --> 01:23:22,539 Where is this oil 589 01:23:23,707 --> 01:23:26,460 with the pine-wood fragrance? 590 01:23:31,006 --> 01:23:35,594 Damn you woman, should be diluted 1:10! 591 01:23:37,429 --> 01:23:40,182 Can you forgive me, Mr. Chairman. 592 01:23:43,602 --> 01:23:46,730 Were I not the brewery chairman, 593 01:23:50,317 --> 01:23:53,070 I would wish to be the manager. 594 01:24:01,495 --> 01:24:03,830 It was a poetic afternoon. 595 01:24:27,312 --> 01:24:29,398 It is good, 596 01:24:30,023 --> 01:24:34,069 as rehabilitation I recommend cycling. 597 01:24:34,861 --> 01:24:37,531 But new times are here. 598 01:24:41,076 --> 01:24:43,161 Everything is short. 599 01:24:45,789 --> 01:24:47,791 Look outside. 600 01:24:50,836 --> 01:24:55,215 - I've cropped my stallion's tail. - Indeed, 601 01:24:56,550 --> 01:24:58,760 you've cut it! 602 01:24:59,177 --> 01:25:00,637 All of it. 603 01:25:01,763 --> 01:25:03,849 And I trimmed... 604 01:25:05,142 --> 01:25:06,685 my moustache. 605 01:25:10,939 --> 01:25:12,649 Beautiful! 606 01:26:23,428 --> 01:26:26,890 This invention shortens distances between people. 607 01:26:26,932 --> 01:26:32,854 Good people, our Agrarian Party will fight for this invention. 608 01:26:33,438 --> 01:26:36,692 In a year or two this invention 609 01:26:36,983 --> 01:26:42,239 will be in very family, for a reasonable price. 610 01:26:42,280 --> 01:26:47,119 - People will listen to the news... - Pepin! 611 01:26:48,328 --> 01:26:51,623 My friends, I don't want to jump to conclusions, 612 01:26:51,665 --> 01:26:57,462 but this device may allow us to listen to news not only from Prague, 613 01:26:57,504 --> 01:27:00,465 even from Brno, music from Pilsner. 614 01:27:00,507 --> 01:27:01,550 Pepin! 615 01:27:01,967 --> 01:27:07,639 Or - not wanting to exaggerate - from as far as Paris! 616 01:27:09,057 --> 01:27:10,517 Pepin! 617 01:27:11,476 --> 01:27:12,894 Come up. 618 01:27:19,067 --> 01:27:23,447 - Shorten them! - Great, we'll shorten everything! 619 01:27:26,366 --> 01:27:28,952 Time, distance. 620 01:27:30,954 --> 01:27:36,042 We'll make short work of it. We'll cut it all short - 621 01:27:37,252 --> 01:27:39,504 it's shearing time! 622 01:27:39,713 --> 01:27:44,301 I'm afraid this apparatus will not bring people happiness. 623 01:27:44,342 --> 01:27:48,138 - But our Agrarian party... - What we mustn't cut short 624 01:27:48,597 --> 01:27:53,101 is our common sense, sister-in-law. 625 01:27:55,687 --> 01:27:59,816 Lucky, somebody's got some brains! 626 01:28:00,317 --> 01:28:03,111 I surprise myself. 627 01:28:03,653 --> 01:28:09,409 Mustn't cut people's rights though! 628 01:28:09,701 --> 01:28:12,829 Don't talk that way, or they'll give you the sack! 629 01:28:12,871 --> 01:28:16,208 They can't - 'cause of our organization. 630 01:28:23,089 --> 01:28:27,886 We hereby cut ourselves off from old Austrian Empire. 631 01:28:32,307 --> 01:28:35,352 You have a motor-cycle of Czech make, 632 01:28:35,393 --> 01:28:39,189 now we have a Czech truck. 633 01:28:39,523 --> 01:28:41,775 Horses belong to the past. 634 01:28:41,817 --> 01:28:45,278 This truck replaces two pairs of horses 635 01:28:45,320 --> 01:28:48,240 and will speed up deliveries to remote places. 636 01:28:48,281 --> 01:28:51,034 Our horses will be off to the slaughter-house. 637 01:28:51,076 --> 01:29:00,669 Our truck will shorten the distance to village inns. 638 01:29:01,336 --> 01:29:05,549 Like a death in the family, Mr. Martin. Take three days off. 639 01:29:16,309 --> 01:29:18,687 - Cut it off! - What? 640 01:29:19,020 --> 01:29:21,022 Like this. 641 01:29:28,238 --> 01:29:29,906 No! 642 01:29:31,992 --> 01:29:36,955 I want it short, like Josephine Baker. 643 01:29:45,589 --> 01:29:46,715 No! 644 01:30:31,593 --> 01:30:36,222 And now some proposals for further improvements. 645 01:30:41,353 --> 01:30:43,271 So, gentlemen! 646 01:30:47,233 --> 01:30:52,864 We shall shorten the distance to the cellars for the barrels. 647 01:30:53,698 --> 01:30:57,661 Master, we are shortening the working-day, tell them. 648 01:30:58,912 --> 01:31:02,916 And we'll be cutting your wages accordingly. 649 01:31:04,334 --> 01:31:06,544 - Now? - Now. 650 01:31:24,938 --> 01:31:27,148 God, you're a magician! 651 01:31:28,191 --> 01:31:30,193 I feel so light! 652 01:31:48,503 --> 01:31:51,214 This cutting short is crazy, 653 01:31:51,256 --> 01:31:54,342 they've cut off the tails of three dogs! 654 01:31:55,677 --> 01:31:58,054 She's shorten her hair! 655 01:32:00,724 --> 01:32:05,645 - And cut her skirt! - A woman's bare knee 656 01:32:05,687 --> 01:32:08,189 is like a Temple of the Holy Ghost. 657 01:32:11,651 --> 01:32:16,156 - The brewery is prospering, but... - It costs a lot of money. 658 01:32:16,197 --> 01:32:19,534 - These new-fangled improvements. - And it lacks order. 659 01:32:19,576 --> 01:32:22,746 - Any goulash going? - We will have to replace you! 660 01:32:22,787 --> 01:32:26,499 My wife complained you didn't recognize her. 661 01:32:38,136 --> 01:32:39,846 Good afternoon. 662 01:32:44,601 --> 01:32:46,352 Where is your hair? 663 01:32:48,730 --> 01:32:50,482 Here. 664 01:33:03,661 --> 01:33:06,206 My tyres don't need pumping. 665 01:33:07,916 --> 01:33:10,210 The pump works. 666 01:34:02,470 --> 01:34:06,724 I bought this pump at Runkasin Boleslav Street. 667 01:34:07,809 --> 01:34:10,895 Now we'll begin a new life. 668 01:34:11,688 --> 01:34:13,314 Yes. 669 01:34:14,607 --> 01:34:17,110 I think, Mr. Manager, 670 01:34:19,028 --> 01:34:21,614 that we'll give you another chance. 671 01:34:47,932 --> 01:34:52,020 The boat is long, the oars are short 672 01:34:52,312 --> 01:34:56,983 Come my love, we will go back 673 01:34:57,692 --> 01:35:05,325 We will go further, to the green forest 674 01:35:31,517 --> 01:35:34,854 Francin, I have something for you. 675 01:35:40,443 --> 01:35:42,195 Look for it! 676 01:35:47,617 --> 01:35:49,535 Cold... 677 01:35:52,664 --> 01:35:54,582 Warmer... 678 01:35:55,708 --> 01:35:57,168 Warmer... 679 01:36:04,384 --> 01:36:05,885 Hot! 680 01:36:09,305 --> 01:36:12,475 Here, I'm carrying a budding author for you!